A new term started. I wasn't looking forward to it because of what happened last term. I’m now an office director at Mathsoc. I have a partner named Randy. He’s “my other half” interpreted in the regular way. As some of the people left town for coop, some of them who were from coop last term, came back to school and started hanging out at Mathsoc. There were Victoria, Christian, Mike, Gary and Mary. There are a lot more people but I’ll introduce them later.
At first, I was developing a crush with Randy. Brad called him “plane”. Mainly because last term, Brad gave John a transportation nickname. So we started this transportation trend for the guys that I have a crush on. A week after knowing Brad, one of the office workers, Jenny, asked where his girlfriend was. He said she is in McMaster. I was crushed. Luckily, it wasn’t a big crush like John’s. It was easier for me to forget about it. I guess I’ve already missed the plane even before buying the ticket or planning to go on a trip at all.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
1.4 What was left at the end of term
When November came, I was already preparing myself to tell John how I feel about him without wanting anything back from him. I was ready. The event was called Leader party. It was for orientation leaders who helped during orientation week. We had amazing food and the time came for me to talk to John. I went up to him and said “can I talk to you?” and he said “okay” just casually sitting on his chair. Eventually, I succeeded in pulling him outside of the room to talk in private.
“I like you.”
He was staring at the ceiling with a grin on his face.
“Don’t worry; you don’t have to say anything because I don’t really expect anything back from you”
He was still staring at me.
“I still want to be your friend.”
“Yes, we will still be friends.”
His words made me feel much better just because he didn’t give me any replies when I told him that I like him.
Then, we went back to the room. Everyone was asking me how it went when he was just at the table beside us. I was thinking to myself of how foolish they were to do that. Afterward, John and I agreed on staying in good terms as friends. I gave him a hug when he was about to leave the party. It was a long hug and it was nice. It felt like he didn't want to let go.
Almost the end of November was a hectic time for us. Not in terms of school, but somehow everything was starting to fall apart. Everyone was very sensitive. But eventually, we got over it. Brandon and Victor moved to Toronto and now we have George, Katharine and me still in Waterloo. We had a lot more friends too. Lisa, Karen, and Brad. I was closer to Lisa because she was the one who has been listening to my stories when I’m happy or sad. She’s a very good secret keeper I must say.
“I like you.”
He was staring at the ceiling with a grin on his face.
“Don’t worry; you don’t have to say anything because I don’t really expect anything back from you”
He was still staring at me.
“I still want to be your friend.”
“Yes, we will still be friends.”
His words made me feel much better just because he didn’t give me any replies when I told him that I like him.
Then, we went back to the room. Everyone was asking me how it went when he was just at the table beside us. I was thinking to myself of how foolish they were to do that. Afterward, John and I agreed on staying in good terms as friends. I gave him a hug when he was about to leave the party. It was a long hug and it was nice. It felt like he didn't want to let go.
Almost the end of November was a hectic time for us. Not in terms of school, but somehow everything was starting to fall apart. Everyone was very sensitive. But eventually, we got over it. Brandon and Victor moved to Toronto and now we have George, Katharine and me still in Waterloo. We had a lot more friends too. Lisa, Karen, and Brad. I was closer to Lisa because she was the one who has been listening to my stories when I’m happy or sad. She’s a very good secret keeper I must say.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
1.3 When it all starts to unfold
Days after days came by, assignments got harder, and I had to deal with a lot of problems. First of all, I found that all of the guys are not happy. How was I supposed to react to that? I couldn’t just leave Katharine all alone and not knowing what is going on. Since the middle of the term, Katharine told me something important. Yes, we had a heart to heart talk and we poured our hearts out. With no doubt, I knew there was something going on. My best friend is interested at someone, and that person is probably interested too. I warned Brandon before he starts to really get attached with his feelings, to re-think about what his actions are going to be.
Brandon just went through with it. Now you would think that they got together. But, wait. There was another character that kind of has a role in my dating life. There’s Jack. He’s a nice guy with a tall posture and also uses glasses. He asked me out on a date. I didn’t really say yes at first. When I was about to answer him, which was around 3 weeks later, he said “it’s okay. I would already assume that you reject me” but instead I said “okay. I’ll go out with you”. Turns out that I wasn’t that into him, and I didn’t really feel like going out on the day itself, so I had to cancel. I feel bad but then, what can I do?
Throughout the term, we as a group take walks, or just me and George, or by themselves. The weather was nice but the vibe that it gives out almost by the end of term wasn’t pleasant. George and Brandon got into a few arguments sometimes. Victor becomes emotional. I, too, was very emotional. I was a bi-weekly writer for the math news. All my entries were rants of how I like John and how hard it is just to tell him how much I feel about him.
Brandon just went through with it. Now you would think that they got together. But, wait. There was another character that kind of has a role in my dating life. There’s Jack. He’s a nice guy with a tall posture and also uses glasses. He asked me out on a date. I didn’t really say yes at first. When I was about to answer him, which was around 3 weeks later, he said “it’s okay. I would already assume that you reject me” but instead I said “okay. I’ll go out with you”. Turns out that I wasn’t that into him, and I didn’t really feel like going out on the day itself, so I had to cancel. I feel bad but then, what can I do?
Throughout the term, we as a group take walks, or just me and George, or by themselves. The weather was nice but the vibe that it gives out almost by the end of term wasn’t pleasant. George and Brandon got into a few arguments sometimes. Victor becomes emotional. I, too, was very emotional. I was a bi-weekly writer for the math news. All my entries were rants of how I like John and how hard it is just to tell him how much I feel about him.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
1.2 Another Chapter started
A few weeks passed by, and one day after class, I dropped by a room on the 3rd floor which they called Mathsoc. It’s actually the mathematics society. I saw someone that I know, Paul. He asked if I would like to sign up for a locker. “Would you like to sign up for a locker?” and shyly I said “is it free?” and Paul, as kind as he is, said yes. Then somehow I was drawn into hanging out in this big office where there were a lot of people around. It is not very clean but also not very dirty. The people there looked very friendly and knew each other. So, I started hanging out at the Mathsoc with Katharine because she called one day and asked where I was and she found me in that room.
From there, I started to know a lot more people and my shyness started to disappear. I became more comfortable around other people and I was able to speak up too. Slowly, I started to know George, and then Brandon, then Victor. We always hang out with them every single night. We stayed at Mathsoc until 11 pm and the 4 of them would always walk me home because I live at the other direction from their house. As for John, after the middle of the term came, I rarely saw him anymore.
From there, I started to know a lot more people and my shyness started to disappear. I became more comfortable around other people and I was able to speak up too. Slowly, I started to know George, and then Brandon, then Victor. We always hang out with them every single night. We stayed at Mathsoc until 11 pm and the 4 of them would always walk me home because I live at the other direction from their house. As for John, after the middle of the term came, I rarely saw him anymore.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
That night when we were supposed to have a shift together, I was too scared to stand by him. My friend, Brenda, said that I can just follow her instead if I’m too scared. But I stayed. We talked a bit that night, but didn’t really get to know him that well. I was too shy. After orientation week ended, it was official that I really have this huge crush with John and I can’t just forget about him. It was hard. But then, school started, assignments started pouring in, and I have a lot of stuff running through my mind. Can he be mine? Does he like me? All of these questions were driving me insane.
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